Oh, my. I have left Bloomington and entered the land of sweets and treats and digital cable!
My friends in Bloomington are all so beautiful and full of light, in every cell. I had many going away celebrations that helped me feel a sense of gradual (temporary?) closure with my life in my southern Indiana paradise. The gifts I received last week will stay with me forever and ever. I cannot stop my heart from coming out of my ears and eyes and mouth… love is never-ending, pure, all. Every minute I write songs and my spirit sings through day and night to those I have left behind yet carry with me infinitely. It’s strange to realize that the love was always there, but something inside me prevented me from recognizing its true nature and depth. These realizations are the first changes I am making on my journey; I can already see that by leaving my loved ones, I am incalculably more in touch with my soul and heart. The doors of my heart are and will remain open forever. This will help me move forward and be present and loving during my trip overseas, and for that, I thank you. I thank you! To everyone who has loved me and still does and will always, thank you. Love and light, in every cell, is all. I miss you and see that it’s silly; how can you miss someone whom you carry constantly within your spirit? I hope you will carry me. Pick up again…
Coming home has been wondrous. I have missed my family so much. There’s so much love in my life right now… it’s amazing. I feel grounded by the two weeks I have in Michigan. It’s nice to not leave everything all at once… gradual departure is key to health, I think. My beautiful family…!
I greatly appreciate, also, the time I have to pack. Yes, I’ve started! I have rather strict requirements for luggage (weight limits, volume limits), but this doesn’t bother me. I’m trying to take essentials, and it might be that I don’t have any trouble staying under the baggage limits. I will be taking a suitcase, a duffel bag, a backpack, and a purse. I like the idea of being able to carry everything at once (which, granted, is a requirement, but it’s empowering to know that my materials will be minimal).
The most common question I’ve been asked over the past few days is: “Are you nervous or excited?” and my response is this: I am supremely excited. I feel nervous but it’s a dull emotion in the back of my mind… I know that the love I have and have received over the past weeks (and will receive over the week and a half to come) has made me capable of achieving anything. I don’t care how it sounds! Any obstacle will be overcome with love and patience and tender care, and my wells are infinite thanks to you.
Things are very crystalline. Every song I hear, every time I look into someone’s eyes, every time I touch someone, everything I taste. I will miss these things, but it will be sweet– not even bittersweet. I have a permanent soul smile.